How do Malaysian women find dates? Many claim to look to friends of friends or through people they know. Is this really the best way to look for that perfect match?

I’ve heard about countless dating experiences that have ended up as social disasters. The usual scenario would be that you’ve met someone through a friend. You click and go out on a couple of dates. Then, you decided for whatever reason that it’s not working. Your friend, who you met him through starts getting involved and there’s a back and forth of information between all of you. Basically, it ends in one tiring experience.

It’s especially difficult if you start to date a friend from your circle. Obviously there’ll be mutual friends involved. If it doesn’t go well, you start avoiding places and people. Since KL isn’t that big to begin with, you start finding less and less places to go and soon you find yourself doing extensive research before heading to a certain place at a certain time!

In the US, dating usually means having a meal with a stranger and developing it from there. They get to know each other and if it doesn’t work, too bad. Chances of you meeting them often or having an uncomfortable situation is thus minimized. Why is it that we Malaysians seem to be weary of that whole concept and skip it altogether? We’d so much rather date someone familiar. Do we really have that many psychos roaming our streets that our screening process needs to be heightened? Are we afraid to spend two hours with a stranger that we might just not click with?

I think, as cynical as it sounds, we need to think about the possible end in the beginning. Are there going to be uncomfortable conversations with anyone? Is your break up going to involve the rest of your friends? Could it get so out of hand that it’ll force you to leave your social circle? If yes, think of possible solutions beforehand or else RUN! So maybe it’s time we consider dating with no strings attached. There’s so much less pressure and chances of making new friends is higher that losing old ones.

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